Work With Stephanie
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” ― Mary Oliver
I love this quote. Not only does it have centre place on the homepage of this website, I have it stuck on the wall in my office as well. It’s a salient reminder to make the most of life; to wring all the juice out of it, to enjoy and savour each and every day. And to keep asking the question…
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
Lives and circumstances change and what you’re doing today may not be appropriate or desirable tomorrow – it’s important to check in with yourself and make sure you’re making the most of your “one wild and precious life.”
To do this most people have goals of one sort or another. Traditionally these are set at the very end of one year or at the start of the next. We all start out with the best of intentions. But then life seems to get in the way. There’s not enough time, there are other pressures, there’s work, family, social life, blah, blah, blah. By about the end of February many of us have given up and are just going through the motions; going to work, coming home, getting dinner, watching TV and blah, blah, blah.
Not reaching goals affects our level of self confidence and motivation
We all know the thrill associated with achieving something. Even something small that we haven’t done before can make us feel good. We perhaps see others achieving great things and wonder what we’re doing wrong. Everyone has the same number of hours in a day so how come some people seems to achieve so much?
If you’ve given up setting goals or are consistently failing to achieve them it nags at your self confidence. I know – I’ve been there myself. The temptation is to do nothing. But doing nothing does not build confidence and motivation – and certainly nothing gets achieved.
And while your goals and dreams remain unfulfilled, life’s passing you by and time’s slipping away.
Part of the problem is how we think about goals
It looks easy!
You can easily envisage where you want to be from where you are now; after all that’s your goal, your dream. But we can sometimes have a simplistic view of achieving goals and we can’t always envisage the dreaded obstacles.
When those obstacles show up, we can lose sight of the goal
The obstacles need to be dealt with in some way. Yet we might not have the skills, training, finances or any number of other internal or external resources to get past the obstacle. We feel stuck and often, our dream remains – just a dream.
You need to think about goals differently!
Those black spots are obstacles such as:
- Lack of Motivation.
- Avoiding Conflict.
- Loss of Confidence.
- Time management issues.
- Limiting Beliefs.
- Values Conflict.
- Relationship issues.
- Dealing with difficult people.
- Lack of skill.
The reality, then, is much more complex
As you can see from the above diagram the reality is not quite as straightforward as we’d like to think. It’s much more like an obstacle course than a 100 metre dash!
In reaching our goals we can be thrown off course by the obstacles we face along the way. Each obstacle is likely to be different from the last so you need a variety of skills and strengths to go around, over, through or under each obstacle. You may not even realise what skill you need until you get to the obstacle. And obstacles seem jump out to surprise you at unexpected times!
The reality is that if you haven’t got the skill required to overcome the next obstacle you are stuck and may give up.
What I’ve found is that people who are successful do things that the rest of us don’t:
- They write their goals.
- They make themselves accountable.
- They deal with obstacles along the way.
- They take responsibility.
- They maintain consistent effort and focus.
I’m sure you’re well aware of these things.
They often also have a secret weapon
That secret weapon is a coach or mentor who helps them maintain effort and focus, keeps them accountable and responsible and helps them deal with the obstacles along the way. And the first thing they do together? Write the goal.
Coaching is goal oriented
Generally people seek coaching to reach some kind of goal, for example a business, career, relationship, sports or spiritual goal. The coaching process is structured to get you from wherever you are to wherever you want to be. In the process you’ll overcome the obstacles that might have previously obstructed you.
Coaching has a significant role to play in helping people to live life to the full; reason enough for the virtual explosion of coaching over the last two decades or so. Coaching wouldn’t have remained so popular if people didn’t recognise the immense value that it can have in helping them achieve their goals and dreams.
But coaching isn’t just about achieving goals and dreams
Coaching is about having someone help and guide you to live your life, in all its many aspects, to its absolute fullest capacity. A good coach will help your develop more of your own potential and expand your self-awareness. By leveraging your gifts and talents you discover ways to unlock your own power, liberate your gutsy courage and reconnect with your compassionate heart. Coaching can help you to not only discover what’s missing, but also find ways to enhance your life so it really ROCKS!
To overcome the obstacles you’ll often learn new skills and develop strengths that will enable you to more easily negotiate future obstacles. Using these skills will empower and motivate you. You’ll develop the resilience to not only to achieve the goal you’re working towards, but future goals as well.
A coach must add value to your life
Often that value might be a direct monetary return on your investment; helping you be more productive, get more sales, stimulate creativity, improve business systems or develop in your role. In fact implementing just one idea or making one change can easily help you recoup your coaching investment – that’s why it’s called an investment and not a cost.
The changes you make can increase the all important bottom-line. At other times the result may be invaluable; an improvement in relationships with your partner, children, colleagues, boss. Feeling more satisfied or content, achieving a work/life balance or setting in place a career path may also be worthwhile and valuable outcomes of a coaching programme.
Why coaching and mentoring?
Coaching defines an ongoing relationship in which a coach helps you focus on taking action toward the realisation of your visions, goals or desires. This might include identifying and removing blocks, helping you change a behaviour or providing structure, support and feedback so you stay motivated and on track.
Coaching is a way to a fast track your personal development; to help you change behaviours that aren’t working and develop new ones that do. In the process you’ll gain many insights about yourself, your relationships and even your work style.
Coaching assumes that the person being coached knows, at some level, everything they need to know. The coach therefore uses various means, including in depth questioning, to enable the person being coached to find their own solutions. The problem with just coaching is that we simply don’t know what we don’t know!
“Mentorship is a personal developmental relationship in which a more experienced or knowledgeable person helps to guide a less experienced or less knowledgeable person. The mentor may be older or younger, but have a certain area of expertise. It is a learning and development partnership between someone with vast experience and someone who wants to learn.”
In reality, I doubt there are many experienced coaches who haven’t strayed into mentoring as part of their coaching. I just want to be open and up front about incorporating mentoring into my coaching. I’ve coached and mentored individuals, business executives, small business owners, department managers and CEO’s over the years. My intention is to do the best I can to add value to the organisation and/or the individual and I believe the combination of coaching and mentoring works best to achieve these aims.
What kinds of people do well with coaching and mentoring?
In my experience the people who get the most out of coaching are those who are passionate about learning and developing their own potential, and who are highly motivated to change or do things differently. They’re also committed to progressively making the necessary changes and thus to the achievement of their goals.
Coaching isn’t for people who are stuck in their ways of thinking and being. To achieve your goals will require effort, focus and an open mind.
Why coaching and mentoring with Stephanie Philp?
Even before I went into business 21 plus years ago, I used to coach my own HR team as well as others in the organisation. Since then I’ve obtained coaching qualifications and studied all manner of subjects to give me broader experience as a coach and mentor. I’ve developed considerable expertise in the following areas:
- Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
- Working with your multiple brains
- Neuro science
- Positive Psychology
- Organisational Change
- Leadership development
- Team leadership
- Small business – set up and management
- Behavioural Change
My qualifications include:
- NLP Master Trainer (IANLP)
- Fellow Member trainer (IANLP)
- Certified mBIT Coach Trainer (Multiple brain Integration Techniques)
- Master Practitioner of NLP
- Certificate in Personnel Management and Industrial Relations, Auckland University
- NLP Master Coach
- (ICI)Coach Master Trainer
- Certified MBIT Evolve Your World Trainer
- Accredited Business Mentor (BMNZ)
Let’s put it like this: I’ve got a ridiculously huge toolkit of skills and experience and consider myself uniquely skilled as a coach and mentor. I use whatever skill I need to get you to wherever you want to go!
I take an holistic approach
Why? Because as a human being you’re not divided up into the different roles you play; business owner, executive, parent, sibling, spiritual being, friend etc. You’re probably all of those things – plus a lot more. I want to make sure that any changes you make in one aspect of your life are going to impact positively on the other aspects of your life.
There’s no point in having a great business/career if everything else is falling apart. That’s why I work with clients to ensure the changes made enhance life as a whole. Read Anna and Niall’s testimonial of my coaching and mentoring with their award winning company PiwiWiwi(see right side bar) as a good example of how this holistic approach works.
What You Should Know
I know how to get more out of you and/or your business. I’m certain that everyone is capable of more than they think is possible. I know what buttons to press, how to challenge you, what questions to needle you with and how to jump start your own creativity.
And should we decide to work together I won’t hesitate to press, needle and challenge. That’s what you’ll be paying me for. I’m insightful, straightforward, practical and have a wicked sense of humour. After all no-one said coaching had to be serious, did they?
Why do people typically seek coaching and mentoring?
It’s challenging to find a ‘typical’ coaching client, because everyone is an individual with different needs, upbringing, background, life experience and career history. So perhaps it’s more useful to answer that question by giving you some examples.
New business owners and solopreneurs
If you’re in this category you’ll know just how challenging starting and growing a business can be. There are dozens of things to think about and then you find dozens more that you hadn’t thought about! While it’s extremely exciting it can also be stressful and it’s easy to miss some of the basics. It’s useful to have someone who’s watching your back, with whom you can have an intelligent conversation, and who will look out for and help you identify your blindspots.
I love the excitement and creativity of coaching and mentoring new business owners. And having been in business myself for over 21 years (as well as having coached numerous business owners) I’ve got a pretty good all round idea of what to pay attention to.
Like teaching someone to fish rather than giving them a fish, Stephanie could always ask the right questions to change our thinking and to crack the problem. Not only would this lead us to the immediate solution, it gave us the skills to handle future questions ourselves.
Time spent with Stephanie was often challenging, sometimes hard but always very, very rewarding. At the end of our second year in business we won two awards based on customer reviews.”
Anna Cunningham and Niall Darwin
PiwiWiwi Surf Campervans Ltd
These people are leaders. They’re in leadership roles but may have little or no formal leadership training. They might have a sales, engineering, project management or technical background and, while having a good grasp of the technical aspects of their role, perhaps find the ‘soft skills’ challenging. They find that treating everyone the same way simply doesn’t work, but are at a loss to know what does work! They’re juggling myriad responsibilities and often find work all consuming, leaving little quality time to spend with family and friends. I coach them in the nuances of how to lead a diverse team. This may include understanding different personalities and the best ways to get the most from each team member. We might also cover conflict resolution, facilitating productive meetings, giving and receiving feedback, time management, getting to the root of a problem etc.
“I would like to personally thank you for the changes you have been so instrumental in making not only to me professionally but also personally.
I had an instant feeling of trust which for me is difficult, but this allowed your guidance to be so openly received and absorbed.
I can say that today I didn’t want to end our session as I had feelings of sadness almost at knowing I would not be in regular contact with you and be able to share with you my triumphs. Cool, calm & collected are triumphs for me…… ?
Thank you for being so great at what you do & caring so sincerely about me & my success.
I shed tears now, you are absolutely amazing & you have been key to changes that will improve my entire life.
Thank you so much.
With sincere heartfelt gratitude,”
Small business owners
Different from a new business owner who is still in the process of setting up their business, the small business owner is more established and sometimes has a few staff. They may still face some of the issues of the new business owner as well as those that present themselves to a senior manager.
CEOs – Small to medium business
Typically this CEO leads a business of 20 – 50 staff. They’re already savvy and successful. They want to move the business forward but might be struggling to galvanise the work force to action. Or the business might have grown so quickly they’re struggling to keep up with demand or know where to go next. They might need a sounding board for ideas and feedback on how they’re handling the diverse situations that present themselves as well as assistance with future strategy.
People who don’t know what they want
This might sound strange but I think it’s not uncommon for people, at some time in their life, to find themselves in a situation where they feel a bit lost; perhaps they’re no longer getting satisfaction from their work or career, they’re dissatisfied with their relationships, they feel stuck in a rut and sometimes even a bit depressed. Talking to friends and family usually results in lots of advice that isn’t always helpful. I assist people in these situations to rediscover their passion for life; to find meaning. And together we work on a plan to help them live a life of purpose.
People who have big goals
These people know what they want and they are also prepared for a challenge. Their goal might be known only to themselves and me; they sometimes don’t have people they feel they can share it with or people around them who will be supportive of their dream. Or occasionally they just want to surprise others with how much potential they have and how much they can achieve.
Where do YOU want to be?
I hope I have given you some idea of what coaching and mentoring can do to add value to your life.
Remember you can download the free Private Coaching and Mentoring Programme which will give you more information and explain some of the popular misconceptions about coaching. Oh! I almost forgot to mention, it can also be a lot of fun!
It’s not for the faint hearted, but if you’re open minded, love learning and want to grow and achieve, please get in touch with me. I’ll send you a Private Coaching and Mentoring Partnership Agreement so you can decide if it’s for you. It’s an essential part of working with me and of your commitment to achieving your dreams and goals.
I’m very happy to schedule a free, no obligation Skype or phone call with you to discuss where you want to be and establish how we might work together. So, it remains for me to ask you the question…
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
Are you in a hurry?
Or do you simply want to turbo-charge the achieving of your goals? Check out my one day coaching and mentoring programme