Kids Funny Exam Answers
These are hilarious answers from the CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST.
Kids were asked questions about the Old and New Testaments. The following statements about the Bible were written by children. They have not been corrected (i.e., incorrect spelling has been left in).
- The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with the unsympathetic Genitals.
- Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.
- The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten amendments.
- The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
- The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
- The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.
- Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah’s wife was called Joan of Ark.
- Noah built an ark, which the animals came on to in pears
- In the first book of the bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world so he took the Sabbath off.
- Lot’s wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.
- Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.
- The epistles were the wives of the apostles.
- One of the oppossums was St Matthew who was also a taximan.
- Jesus enunciated the Golden Rules, which says to do one to others before they do one to you. He also explained, a man doth not live by sweat alone.
- Solomon, one of David’s sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.
- Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
- It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.
- The people who followed the lord were called the 12 decibels.
- David was a hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. He fought the Finklesteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times.